John Wayne vs the Petticoat Approach to Parenting

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at 2021.01.30
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And that’s been pretty much my husband’s approach. His advice for parents would be to just chuck the kid out into the middle of the pond. Let him sink …or swim. He’s pretty much the same way when it comes to managing child behavior. “Let reality be the teacher”, he’d advise. Learn from the school of hard knocks. Let him touch the hot stove. He won’t do it a second time. Well, I’m a mom, and I’m much too protective to adopt this approach. Where my kids are concerned, I want to protect them from all of life’s abrasions. I think most moms are like this. We devour articles on parenting, hoping for the right advice. Hoping that we’re doing the right thing. We try to guide our kids through life as gently as we can. It tears us apart to see them hurt or injured.

My husband would argue that his method is the most humane and caring because it makes the child stronger and prepares him better for the difficulties that lie ahead. And maybe he’s right. I suspect though, that in spite of his macho stance, he’s secretly monitoring the situation and is ready to step in to help if he’s needed.

At any rate, to resolve our different approaches, we invented a tool for child behavior management. We call it the Better Behavior Wheel. Basically, it consists of a roulette wheel type of board with consequences around the perimeter instead of numbers. When our kids misbehave they get to spin. It’s very effective.

But where it really shines, in my opinion, is in the way it combines both of our parenting styles so there’s no longer any disagreement on the appropriate course of action. With the Wheel we all sit down ahead of time and select which consequences should be put on the board for each particular misbehavior. My husband gets to have his say, as do the kids and myself. Once we’ve all agreed, there’s no more discussion or disharmony. When the kids misbehave, out comes the Better Behavior Wheel. And as parents, we’re no longer the ‘bad guys’, but merely interested bystanders. Child behavior management has never been easier.

When we showed the device to our friends they all wanted one too, so we reluctantly started building them. Today we’ve helped over 10,000 grateful parents with our invention, and the orders just keep coming in. Not only did the Wheel give us well behaved kids, it also created peace and harmony in our home, as my husband and I no longer argue over how to deal with our kids’ innapropriate behavior. Today, our kids have grown into delightful young adultsFeature Articles, and we like to think that the Wheel had a great deal to do with that.

Parenting Photo
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By Free-Photos from Pixabay

Parenting a toddler can truly restore your you because of the playful nature and share wonder of the child. But at the very same time it can be one of the most trying responsibilities that you will ever face. It is not always a pleasant task raising children so with that in mind I have compiled some less-obvious parenting principles geared to help you raise a perceptive, secure and happy child. Specifically, these suggestions are to help you find sensible ways to handle your toddlers unhappy moods.

Parenting a toddler can truly restore your you because of the playful nature and share wonder of the child. But at the very same time it can be one of the most trying responsibilities that you will ever face. It is not always a pleasant task raising children so with that in mind I have compiled some less-obvious parenting principles geared to help you raise a perceptive, secure and happy child. Specifically, these suggestions are to help you find sensible ways to handle your toddlers unhappy moods. Here is what I believe to be some helpful advice:

When your child becomes upset and starts screaming you must first, and you’ll be surprised to read this, be sure that you remain calm before you do anything. Put your focus on yourself. At least try it and see what happens. Let me explain.

You obviously want to comfort your child and sooth them in any manner possible. But in order to be the most effective at doing this, you must feel better yourself. You cannot help anyone else if you cannot help yourself, and parenting a toddler is certainly no exception.

Kids will pick up on your emotions and an instance, especially the negative ones. You do not have to believe in any New Age garbage to be able to “feel the mood in the air.” The manner in which to move and speak are easily picked up by even the youngest of children. Kids are anything but dumb, and I’m sure you already know that.

During the explanations of airplane safety procedures, they always insist that you put your own oxygen mask on first, and then put the oxygen mask on your child. This is a striking example, and a perfect metaphor for what I am suggesting about parenting a toddler, or any age child for that matter.

You cannot help your child if you are incapacitated or functioning at a subpar level. Kids learn by watching and doing. Always keep this in mind. Look within and see if you are feeling uncomfortable. Slow down. Take some breaths. Even in the most chaotic of times you must always focus on being calm and in control of your emotions.

Shift your attention inward. Parenting a toddler is not easy, but you must find some centeredness despite the chaos. Be willing to try. Put yourself in the child’s shoes and know that they look to you for everything. Your kids will pick up on things that you have no idea that they even notice. These are the very things that make parenting a toddler so incredibly important.

You may think that putting your own emotions first is somehow selfish but if you truly understand what I’ve been trying to say you realize that it is anything but. It means that you put your child to first and truly love them. You must open your heart firstFree Articles, and this will subliminally teach your child to do the same. Parenting a toddler is all about doing what is best for the child and in many cases that means doing what is best for you.

Parenting Photo
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By nastya_gepp from Pixabay

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